The 7 Year Life Cycle

"Life is a process of growing and outgrowing,

and what fits snugly today, be it an idea, attitude,

or belief, may be entirely the wrong size tomorrow."

~Sally Brompton

I encourage you to read that quote a couple more times before reading this post today. I had a patient yesterday who struck such a chord with me that I had to tell all my girlfriends about it at happy hour last night and felt compelled to research then write about it this morning. 

I have been cleaning this particular woman's teeth for nearly 2 years now. She's in her late 60's but has the energy and aura about her of someone in their 30's. I always get extra excited when I see her name on the schedule. When she takes a seat we start catching up on the last 6 months of our life and updating each other on everything we have been doing.( I typically run late with her so I have to be mindful of our talks and timing! hehe). She then asks me if I'm familiar with the idea of the 7 Year Life Cycle. I had never heard of it so she explains it the best she can in the small amount of time we have left. This morning I started googling and wow, does it make a world of sense. I'll try to sum it up the best I can!

"There is a natural release of energy every seven years which encourages us to move forward and make changes. It is the soul's demand to be seen as an individual not as a collective."

In other words, there is a spark within us every 7 years that is yearning to dig deeper into our individuality and stray away from the way we think we should be whether it be in the eyes of our parents, our peers, our teachers, or our partners. We are gradually influenced by others during the course of our life and there comes a time where we will want to break free of the way "it should be". If the need to seek our individuality is ignored or stuffed away somewhere then resentment, hurt, anger and other negative feelings have the chance of following us down the years of life. Each description is meant to be focused on finishing the end of that particular cycle:

1-7: When we are this age we are pliable and must accept that what is said is so. Eventually, young kids will start to use the word "No" in order to show their aggressiveness. By age 7, kids are able to put a rationale to the word no. "No, because..."

7-14: Ahhh think back to middle school years. I think they were some of the toughest for me because kids at that age can be cruel and we were so worried about what everyone thought about us. Teenagers can be looked at as pesty, but in reality they are just trying to find their identities. They are being shaped and molded by those around them and deep inside they are seeking for the individuality we all possess. This is the stage that is preparing us for adulthood. 

I should mention here that there is an aggressiveness through the cycles. We all want to find that individuality and what our point, if you will, of being on this earth really is. If we shove these feelings aside and try to ignore them, they will build on top of the next life cycle, giving you even more weight to deal with in the coming years. 

14-21: High school into college years. Another tough set of years because again, we are told to be and act a certain way. Even if we aren't 100% confident (I mean, who is at this age?), we do things anyway that maybe we don't feel good about doing. But we are worried about what society and others will think of us. At 21, we are ready to cut ties from our parents and move to be solely on our own. I realize this has changed in the recession especially, more and more people are moving in with their parents for financial support etc. But this is referring more to the emotional aspect. We are in the "Don't tell me, I already know" mind frame.

21-28: The greatest realization of adulthood occurs at 28! 28 is when we begin to integrate with the rest of the world and with the "Ok world, what have you got to give me?" approach. Opportunities start to come into our lives and we have a serious moment of thinking about the windows of opportunity that stand before us. Which road do we go? What do we want? At 28, whether you are single or in a relationship, we are still searching for our true identity. We may pick up new hobbies or interests or even decide to conquer this world solo for the time being because we know we have the rest of our lives to be selfless and depended on. We have a desire to do new things and head in new directions. 

28-35: True emotional adulthood arrives. We are finally able to withstand being influenced by the attitudes of others. It is the opportunity to become free of the emotional stigma of the past and to let all of that go because your individuality and the person you are cannot be shaken anymore from outside influence (this is towards the end of this cycle around 35). You are probably deciding for the first time in your life, exactly that YOU want to do. You are finally separating those concepts which are really yours from those which belong to somebody else. 

"Every age, every cycle, has special things to be known, understood, and worked with. There is NO time in our lives that do not have validity! In each cycle there is a need for unfoldment and a release from pre conceived attitudes. It gives a freedom which permits major change in attitudes, in relationships, and in career."

35-42: The 42nd year is a polarity of the 28th year. The view is no longer, "World, what can you give me?" but instead "World, what have I got to give you?" It is the realization of all the growth we have been through and our ability to use this growth in the most productive way possible. Doubts tend to come up but they are not a negative thing. We ask ourselves whether we wish to maintain our life as it is or whether we are ready to make new changes. Doubt can be positive if it is leading you to be suspect of something in your life that is not good for you.

42-49: Doubt tends to follow us into this cycle and we look back at our life and ask ourselves "Where have I been and what have I done with my life?" We begin to wonder if it is too late and the truth is that it is never too late to do anything that makes you happy. We are able to let go of very small things that will make room for newer and bigger things. One may view this cycle as a last chance to be productive, show their ability, or to make a name for themselves. New hobbies or passions start to enter our minds. 

I am going to stop here because the first 7 cycles from age 7-49 are the spiraling of all the change within us. The cycles that come after this time are expansions of the same 7 spirals once again. We have been given everything we need to make changes in our life and to fulfill our personal goals--- provided that we listen to our inner selves and NOT the external forces/people/things that will try to mold us. This is obviously going to change from person to person. For example, if we are still raising a family in our 7th cycle, the ability to just pick up something new may not be feasible. So the urge may then trickle into the next cycle as long as the person does not let themselves believe that it is too late! It is never too late to follow what makes you happy!

The overall point to all of this is that there is a natural release of energy every seven years which encourages us to move forward and make changes. It helps to keep us from getting stuck in a rut, which I will admit is my absolute biggest fear of life. If we are able to flow with these cycles, we are able to find change less fearful. 

**When I look back at my own life and as I am coming to the end of the 4th cycle, I see a lot of sense in this theory. Although I wish when I was making changes to my life that it had not been at the expense of hurting others, I know that the experiences which were brought to me were needed. Decisions both right and wrong, are learning experiences. And sometimes a wrong decision ends up being the absolute right decision. We will have crossroads in our lives where we are forced to reevaluate and try to decide which route to take. I thank God daily for the growing ability He's giving me to make the healthier, happier, kinder and more compassionate decisions which will not only serve me but those around me. He keeps reminding me that His route is far better than mine. As I go through my life cycles, I know He is with me, guiding me through these transitions and it keeps me confident and far less fearful!

Xoxo,
Jackie